Wasting our time

This week was relatively uneventful and disappointing. Despite the high that I started the week in, nothing worked well. I didn’t get much chance to jam this weekend. Only on Saturday night actually. On that day, Xander was drunk and we had that usual argument on how to practice; whether to learn our parts before jamming or not. Today evening, I experienced another rocking live rock show featuring Vayu and Zero. For the second week in running, I feel that we (the band) are wasting our time by not going out there and playing live. That’s so evident from the stuff that some bands out there come up with.

On my professional side, I did a major surgery without anybody else’s guidance. That’s also positive.

I hope to turn things around at the jam sessions in the coming week.

Conviction confirmed

Today I reaffirmed my conviction, something that has been growing inside me for a long time. I went to a underground rock show at Razzberry Rhinoceros in Juhu with S. My first ever live underground show. Interestingly, in the first half an hour I went and played bass on stage! [I’ll give you time to get back from the fall that you sustained after that hit you hard in your face].

Ahem, yes… I did that. That is actually not even worth mentioning. I played bass for ‘Alive’ for half the song. That too on a de-tuned bass guitar. It was not really enjoyable but I still enjoyed that little 2 minutes of fame. Anyways, back to the reaffirmation of my conviction!

Then the Helga’s Fun Castle came, they played and they conquered… the audience first and ME for sure. They were so amazing sounding especially with the mesmerizing mastery behind the drums by Dino Banks. Johann was sounding as good as ever. Sidd was singing great and the guitarist was also doing well. S. was also virtually blown away by the performane.

After the show, we had a little talk at the McDonald’s eatery. S. was saying that we should be performing like all the bands do. He also said that he was setting aside his personal life for 3 years or so for music; no girlfriends, movies etc. Suddenly I thought what was happening with my life and Victor.

In the night after I came back, I had a chat session with Victor. I explained to him that time is not letting our relationship to go further ahead. He was understanding and has agreed to be just a ‘friend’ and not a ‘date’/’lover’. That was surprising really. He is so understanding. That made me a lot relieved.

While I was chatting with him, I discovered my original songs (recordings) of which from an old CD from Xander’s place. I’m now listening to them. Maybe one or two of them might end up in the docu-drama.

Strange day

It was the strangest of days. The day started out peacefully. I finished up my hospital work by mid afternoon and called Xander and S. Xander was free and eagerly expecting us to join. S. was at home and was apparently making some midi tracks for us to practice on. As I was starting, it suddenly started pouring. I was delayed by an hour and by the time I had reached there it was around 4.

Xander showed me the printout of the e-mail that he had received regarding the soundtrack of the docu-drama that he had been offered earlier in the week. If I hadn’t mentioned about it before, Xander was offered an opportunity to make three original tracks for a docu-drama by one of his friends who’s making the movie. It was about a company which employed a slightly higher proportion of disabled employers (who were referred to as ‘differently abled’; which I thought was cool).

They wanted us to come with slow, mellow rock songs which could relate to emotions like triumph/strength, happiness, love, sadness, confusion in communication etc. The task itself looked interesting and challenging. Then we tried analyzing some songs in our collection which we thought could fit into this. We had a little bit of an argument about the emotions of the songs; me judging with the music/melody and Xander judging by the lyric. After an hour of that, we finally turned to a few of our own songs which could be modified and put in.

That was going nicely until Xander’s girlfriend G. came in. She and Xander started kissing and making out. I tried to pretend to ignore them and the stuff they were doing. But the rest of the time I spent there trying to learn some songs was meaningless. I had plans to meet Victor later on in the evening and I needed to go back to the hospital for the round. I left confirming with Xander that we were not jamming in the night.

After I finished my round, I tried calling Victor. He didn’t pick up the phone. I was confused. I gave him an SMS and then I lay down in the bed thinking what had happened. I must have dozed off and I got up at around 2 AM with a headache. I had forgotten to eat. I went down to eat an absolutely pathetic meal. Then I came back up to sleep.

I don’t know what to make of this day. Two important things happened – both regarding personal relationships. One is that I’m not able to manage mine. Second is that Xander’s personal life is interfering with the band’s progress.

Stagnancy

It is official now. The readership in my blog has plummeted. I know the reason for it but I can’t do anything about it. My life in the hospital keeps me busy still to prevent me from posting on the blog. Whatever time I steal from the hospital, is currently being used for just one purpose; music. The rest of my life seems to have stagnated. Of course, I still get my dose of porn/cyber sex with the computer. But that’s about it.

The last time I was whining about it all was last week when I had taken a resolution to do everything what I wanted to. Since then, I’ve been very busy. Just the one night I got free time, I went to Xander’s and had an unproductive jam session. What else did I do in my free time. Apart from browsing on the computer and chatting with my date a couple of times, I helped my senior in his thesis. Bull shit. My life is so stagnant!

I’ll need to do something about this.

Back to WorldSpace

Today was the third day in consecution during which WorldSpace Satellite radio was on round the clock in my room. What I have done is to connect my computer speakers to the radio. And I have been listening to the music continuously. I have been switching between three channels; BOB – the alternative rock channel, Voyager – adult contemporary, BBC World Service. It has been a wonderful time. Reminiscent of the time I had at home with my radio. Songs like ‘High & Dry’ by the Radiohead get played in between ‘World Wide Suicide’ and ‘Danny California’.

Besides, I had a chat session with my date Victor. He wants to meet me on the weekend. I have still not confirmed the timing. Lets hope I don’t disappoint him yet again. It has been too long and I’ve been taking too much of liberty to almost neglect him.

A bad session

Tonight, I went to Xander’s place after a tiring routine. I was very tired after the heaviness of the work at the hospital. Why I decided to go was because Xander had called me earlier in the evening informing about a probable visit by one of our common friend/ movie director who had an offer for us. He was making a movie/documentary and wanted us to make the background music for it. It is very challenging and probably will earn us some money.

We could really do well with some money. I could, for example, buy a bass guitar/bass processor etc. By the time I had started, I knew that the friend was not coming over. But still I thought we could jam something. But the jam session was bad. He was almost drunk and was in a mood play a couple of songs which I was not prepared for. I felt disappointed in the night. The only respite being able to watch one episode of the Simpsons and Rockstar Supervnova.

The Supernova show is mindblowing. The cockiness and the arrogance of the judges is so irritating. But there are some amazingly talented guys in there.

After a gap

Today, finally I got some time to type something on my blog. If you are asking me why I haven’t yet found time, I don’t know why? I don’t have a clue as to why I’ve not been finding time to even see Victor once after our two dates. That has been bugging me so much that I don’t know what to do. Thankfully, I just had a chat conversation with him and he’s being very kind to me. We are planning to meet this weekend. Lets hope things work out well.

Otherwise, amazing stuff at music. We’ve been jamming regularly. But not without issues. Conflict of ideas as usual always is there when creativity flows. But still, we are doing well. Xander is dating G. regularly these days. S., who has the nick ‘EBoy’ (for enormous boy; 6 foot 3 inches and the boyish looks), amazes us every day with his amazing sleep routine – about 16 hours in a day – like a cat!

And I’ve not yet started on my academics. That will start now. Everything has to happen together in my life now – Music, dating and studies. Or else, I would have to think of myself as a loser!

Portugese minister

Isn’t he awesome? Why are all these latino dads so hot?

From a yahoo story Colombia’s ambassador to U.S.resigns

The Blasts

Yesterday, I had hit the sack for a nap by around 5.45 pm. Most of the work for the OT had been done. I got up at 7.50,again going through the same scary feeling that I always have when oversleeping. Hastily I brush, pour some water over my head. As I head back to my room from the bathroom, I see my senior sitting at the mess downstairs sipping a cup of tea. Shit! He’s going to shout at me again.

I dress up as fast as I can and I rush to ward using the stairs on the other end of the building so as to not go through the mess. As I went pass the door to the mess, I notice that my senior had already left. I run through the corridor. It felt strangely discordant and chaotic. Lots of extra people, security and police. I don’t have a clue as to what had happened.

I meet my senior at the bottom of the building where my wards are. I expect an amazing doze of firing. Instead he asks me, do you know about the blasts? I shook my head partly in surprise, partly anxious. He tells me that there have been a series of blasts in the suburban railway network and the victims are being rushed to hospitals, our hospital being the prime centre for it.

Then we went and took a quick round. During the round I realize that we are all called to attend the emergency in the rescue activities. After the round, which went almost uneventful, I go back to the mess to have some food, something which I didn’t have since yesterday night. While chewing on the half-cooked rice of the Veg. Pulav, I watch the TV channels showing the pictures of the blast sites and victims.

After my meal, I went to the emergency. I helped them out in the way I could seeing new patients, giving first aid treatment etc. I hear stories of shattered faces, torn eyeballs and prised chests. I was late by about 2 hours. But still I managed to help out. That’s more important I feel. I retired from active assisting at 3 AM as I had to stay awake OT today.

Italians are hot

I admit that I have a liking for Italians. Italians, be it football, mafia or life, have an air of charm and self-assuredness. Italian ministers (power daddies et al) are amazingly hot therefore. This video just confirms that!